who's Oslo are we talking about?

I just read this travel review about Oslo...

Well... what can I say? I'm amused? Confused? Was he actually in the same city I've been living in for the past decade? All a bit over the top, methinks...

Anyway, here are some excerpts from the article I found particularly amusing... and my comments...

Like his fellow crewmen, he looked like a male model in a construction worker outfit.

Uh, please tell me where these model-construction workers are because I have yet to see any. The contruction workers I see are oldish, uglyish, and Polish... (and they barely speak Norwegian, let alone English)...

All of the other patrons were fit, tall, and fashionably dressed, with impossibly high cheekbones. Three-quarters of them were blond. Think for a moment of the kind of crowd you see swarming around an all-you-can-eat buffet in Las Vegas, and then imagine the extreme opposite.

Again, probably "right place at the right time" combined with the fact that the particular restaurant he visited is a bit more for the "beautiful people" rather than "your regular average Norwegian," who may not be (OK, is not) as fit and tall and fashionable and blond as the writer has seen. I wonder what he would have written had he visited, say, Asylet. Or Ivars Kro. The "typical Norwegian" does not go to Solsiden...

A glass of house white costs $12, a package of muffin mix at the supermarket $6. I even found a store that was selling dish towels—nice dish towels, but dish towels all the same—for $47. Each.

I'm not sure where he found dish towels for 47 bucks (282 NOK), but whoever is dumbass enough to pay that much for a fucking dishtowel gets what he/she deserves. Like getting ripped off. You can probably get them for 1/10th that price at IKEA, for fuck's sake... (OK - I had to look it up - you can get a dishtowel for 5 NOK at IKEA...

I don't know anything about the price of muffin mix though, as I don't buy that kind of crap, but you can actually get a glass of wine for less than 72 NOK many places.

For one thing, Norwegians don't spend all their time talking about real estate.

Has he talked to many Norwegians?

Laura and I spent our last twenty-four hours in Oslo living the ultimate Norwegian day. In the morning, we walked up and down Bygdøy Allé—the main street in an upscale part of town with the amusing name of Frogner—drooling over the storefront displays of custom kitchens. (No one does kitchens like the Scandinavians, not even the Italians.)

For lunch, we grabbed a baguette with seafood salad and smoked salmon, then walked through Frogner's leafy streets to the Artesia Spa, which was also designed by Snøhetta. Laura had a facial. I had a massage and afterward sat in the steam room (which was all white marble and right angles) before proceeding to the sauna. I poured successive ladles of water onto the hot rocks, dunked myself in the cold-water tub, and headed to the pool. It had an infinity edge, and beyond it, projected onto the wall, was a film depicting underwater life. The effect was eerie and womblike, and highly relaxing.

We continued on to Grünerløkka, which everyone had told us was the new and hip part of Oslo—until we actually got there and were informed that Grünerløkka is over and that the real action is now in Grønland.

This is the ultimate Norwegian day? That's news to me. It sounds more to me like having a posh day on the town, something that you can do in most other big cities, but, whatever...

There was a three-bedroom flat with maple floors and a clean white kitchen. That one, I thought, and pondered the joy of purchasing a home in a land where European appliances come standard.

Huh?!

Oslo is exquisitely clean and safe.

Again... huh? He wrote about Grünerløkka and Grønland, but did he really look around? Or is the amount of garbage on the streets of Oslo less than what he's used to? Perhaps he was also in Madrid recently, where the sidewalks that are used as both an ashtray and a deposit for dog shit. Anything after that must seem "clean"...

As for safety, I wonder if he and his precious Laura heard of all the violent rapes that had been going on for a while. Or about the gang wars. Probably not...

Vigelandsparken censored...

Censorship at the famous Vigeland Park in Oslo. Someone couldn't handle naked statues or nudity at all and thought it would be worthwhile to put black paper "porn bars" on the statues' genitals and boobs...

OK... while vandalism is vandalism, it could have been much worse... that crying baby's head has been cut off a few times for starters, so this is really "nothing" in comparison, but still... that someone must really have a lot of time on their hands...

(btw - it's a bit too early for "russ" pranks)

tourist in my own town - the Madiba: Man of Destiny exhibit

boyfriend of feitpingvin and I went to see Peter Magubane's "Madiba: Man of Destiny" photo exhibit at the International Cultural Center and Museum here in Oslo. It is about the life of Nelson Mandela and the fight against apartheid from the end of the 1950s to Mandela's release to now - the new South Africa.

Magubane captured many disturbing episodes during the apartheid regime, including Mandela's arrest, student demonstrations, various massacres, and the resulting funerals. His photographs have been show in, among others, Life magazine, The New York Times, National Geographic and Time magazine. For his efforts, Magubane has been jailed and tortured, and even banned from taking any photographs at all. It's a good thing he never let anything stop him...

I think some of my favorite photos were ones where white people were also included. It's very obvious that the blacks were opposed to the evils of the apartheid regime. It's easy to forget how many white South Africans were also involved in the struggle. I'm not sure what my absolute favorite photo was though. I think I'll have to go back and have a look again. The exhibit was free after all ;-)

There are lots of good museums in Oslo. Several of them have free admission. We really need to get our act together and visit them more often...

travelling to Oslo? (with update)

If you are, I strongly recommend not staying at any Scandic hotel. Here's why...

The hotel discriminates against Cubans - article in Norwegian - article in English

So because the United States government has some kind of childish gripe with Cuba, a Cuban delegation to a conference in Norway was suddenly told they were not allowed to stay in a Norwegian hotel. In Norway. A country that does not have some kind of childish gripe with Cuba. How dignified and mature of the hotel owners and certain members of its staff (not). This group of Cubans had otherwise been using the hotel for the past five years for this conference, before the chain was bought up by Hilton...

All that the administrative director of the hotel, Geir Lundkvist, has to say is that he "regrets the situation." Wow. Regrets? What a spineless wanker! (I'll bet he's more sorry about this making Aftenposten and probably a few other blogs than my own than kicking out the Cubans.) He doesn't even have the balls to explain himself. Or tell big boss Hilton to piss off. I wonder what the deal is anyway, what kind of kickbacks he's getting... Then again, it could be a ploy to bring attention to the fact that the hotel owners are a bunch of twats...

Nonetheless, this kind of discrimination is unacceptable. And un-Norwegian. It is not normal to suddenly start banning specific nationalities from hotels or whatever here. I really hope that there is an investigation as to what extent this is legal in Norway. I hope Scandic gets sued for this. In the meantime, stay away from the hotels...

Update: Hah! Charges filed!